What do you think about foreign wives and husbands?

[Pathways Of Grace]

I was wondering what everyone thinks about marrying someone from a different country and culture. I've had many people (all ladies) say that men just do that because they want someone who will serve them. Of course (I believe) that there has been a massive effort to de-feminize women in the USA, but that aside, people are just people and it's the person that makes the difference — no matter where they live.

I also believe that marriage should be biblical and the woman SHOULD let the husband lead, it's his duty to God to do so. But that doesn't mean the woman serves him in the sense that many men and women believe today. The service by both is to God first and then to each other.

I often quote a saying that "marriage is like a pair of pants, each gets a pant leg and learns to walk together". This elimates the whole "who is going to lead" argument because you both have to do your part to get anywhere (smile). But at the same time the right leg is NOT the left leg and the left leg is NOT the right leg, and no one gets the whole pair of pants!

What is your thought on this? And why do you suppose people look offshore for the love of their lives? Do foreign men and women have something that their western counterparts are missing? Or is it simply that they have a more traditional (biblical) view of marriage than we do?

Blessings,

Jonathan (Admin)

[Lizzy]

Hmmm, good question. Is Canada one of the choices? ;) Oh, and I prefer dresses. He could have both 'legs'.

Real love is so precious I think wherever you find it, it is wonderful.

Lizzy

[Pathways Of Grace]

Hmmm. methinks you missed by assertation completely:

I also believe that marriage should be biblical and the woman SHOULD let the husband lead, it's his duty to God to do so. But that doesn't mean the woman serves him in the sense that many men and women believe today. The service by both is to God first and then to each other.

Jonathan (Admin)

[Pathways Of Grace]

Ahhh, you DID read what I posted!

[Curt]

Its late here so I can't really elaborate but those of you that know me know that I can get long winded and have about part of this particular subject. Related to the initial question, not the other implications of what you brought forward, I am for marrying a Christian regardless of the country of origin. It makes no difference to me.

The discussion about who leads, submissiveness, versus subserviance, versus HelpMeet is for another time haha.

Curt

[Shaina]

I suspect that they have the same view of marriage as we do. And if not, they will shortly after they've arrived. From my observation, men seeking foreign wives tend to be looking for someone they can dominate. And bringing someone from another culture & or language does create an imbalance of power. That plus the need to be married a minimum number of years in order to be allowed to stay. This is biblical how?

However, over time the balance of power will shift and things will change.

[Pathways Of Grace]

lol! Hi Shaina, good to have you and see you on the forums! Actually I didn't say they had a more biblical viewpoint, I actually asked do you think people THINK they have a more biblical viewpoint and use that basically as a criteria for selecting a mate. Also I was speaking of both foreign wives AND husbands.

Blessings,

Jonathan (Admin)

[Shaina]

Yes it is true, I did notice your attempt at PCness. Which I applaud *claps energetically*. I haven't heard of too many women seeking foreign grooms have you? I have been hit on by men seeking women in North America, they are often much younger sometimes younger than my son!

Gee, what do you think the motive there is?

[Daniel Baumet]

Fact every person except First Nations persons are foreign persons. Fact many of us here are the result of the merging of nations .. (Is there any left that are "pure")
Fact many men feel that they are loosing the grip on society .. a fact that was never meant to be. Where was Eve (Isha) created from ?
Walk along side dear wife for such is your plce, serve me as I serve you , I will provide to the best tht Y'shuah grants me prosperity... May our cattle and goats, may our sheep and ox all bring forth that we may never wnat , may our hands prosper every thing we plant that we may lay our portion great before Adonai. ( A quote from an ancient Messianic prayer.)
Constantine removed many of the privilages not only of persons in fellowship but even in family and we as a world have been struggling to yell "Let my people go"
Ultimatly scriptures teach "wives to submit to husband " yet the same tell us that we are to "submit one to another." also the other half of them (wives) submitting have a condition .. we (husbands ) need to submit to G_d. What I have noted in conflicts that I have mediated is that wives have a hiher tendancy to reflect a spiritual condition. We raise our fist against our G_d and poof our wives respond the same. I couseled one lady .. who was stressed over her divorce, "You reflect our positon, a one way love, you loved him he did not return your love" How many can testify of this? A one way love He (Yeshua) loves us so much He gave His life (no greater love right) yet we do not return it ... continue to serve other gods (self, mammon , ect.)
Every divorce I have found marks a sin... not just in our life .. but in the church and in the world.
As far as "off shore" goes .. the greater portion of my life have listend to "ewww not you " ," Your not my type" or better yet " Iam looking for a man of God... but Go has not sp[oken to me regarding you.." What do they expect a rock out of the sky? Sheeesh.
A foriegn woman is not nesscessarily looking at an exterior nor is she always so "docile" she would be happy and content as she has found a husband. Sad to say many "Local" men would take advantage of that and abuse her. I think it should be her to use cation to us .. not us to them.
That is my two cents worth .. hmmmm ?? What you say Jim ??? OK may be a bucks worth.

[Shaina]

So what's it take to import a spouse these days anyway?

Has anyone looked into this? Daniel? Jonathan?

[Pathways Of Grace]

Nope I haven't .... but there is something that bugs me about the phrase 'import a spouse' versus 'bringing a loved one home'. lol!

[Shaina]

Sorry if that sounded crass but it does kind of follow eh? If one goes shopping for a spouse over seas then when you find one... you import him/her.

Ok maybe I do have some unpleasant feelings leftover from some of the threads on this subject that occured on that site that shall not be meantioned.

[Daniel Baumet]

I really do not know what it takes to "import" a spouse these days .. I have not imported one as of yet. I have exported a few lol ...
You thinking Sari? lol One can always research (google ) immigration. Nothing like having a few cool thousand or so. In the immigration buissness it really is all about the money.